Note to Self:
COMMUNICATE, don’t FABRICATE!
So, I wanted to share the results of my dinner with you all…
Lesson 1 – Even when you’re pretty confident you know the full story, don’t assume you do, until you have talked things over, because
Lesson 1, Sub-Section A ) you will
never rarely know the entire story, and
Lesson 1, Sub-Section B ) if you are wrong (as we so often are), there’s less to beat yourself up about after everything is all said and done.
Lesson 2 – Worrying about what to say beforehand is futile. Nothing ever goes the way you expect.
Lesson 3 – Never listen to any of your own negative thoughts about what is going on inside someone else’s head, or about the intent behind their (apparent) actions.
Lesson 4 – I’ve still got lots of issues to work on!
Lesson 5 – Even though it turns out that basically, I’d just been full of a lot of resistance about my own false perceptions, the ‘work’ I did that night in my posts allowed me to have a joyful, loving lunch and real conversation with my friend.
I didn’t go into this dinner armed for battle, I went with the intent to be seen, and I feel both seen and heard. Now that I think about it, I hope she does, too. Admittedly, I talked more than I listened… but since my heart was troubled and hers was not, I think that is actually how it was supposed to work?
I am both humbled and grateful for this experience. Grateful to be able to feel love for my friend without pain again. Grateful I hadn’t acted rashly. Grateful that I am now aware of a pattern of thoughts in my mind which need adjustment.
Grateful that I have now experienced what it feels like to approach someone about something which I am struggling with, as it relates to them, in a more loving way, and with the acknowledgement that it is me and my perception of certain circumstances that is causing the problem.
I am grateful for my increasing ability to grow and change quickly, and with less difficulty.
I’m grateful for you, also. I always know that when I am troubled, someone out there will understand my words, and know where I’m coming from.
All is well that ends well, and I sincerely hope that showing the depth of my self-imposed despair (and the fact I had completely fabricated her ‘motivations’… the entire time believing I was seeing ‘what is’) will help someone stop, even for a moment, and COMMUNICATE, not FABRICATE.
Namaste & Blessed be!