Most of you have probably noticed an apparent ‘sudden change’ in my blog posts recently. I’m talking less about ‘inner’ work, and more about ‘outer work’.
On the surface, the two may seem unrelated, but in fact, they are closely intertwined. I began doing the inner work to feel better about myself. As time has passed, feeling better began to include what I put into my body. Not just intellectually, news, entertainment, etc, but also the food I was putting into it. I began noticing some foods sat well, while others made me feel bad, even if I enjoyed eating or drinking them, they were not doing anything good for my body. Some things I will probably choose to avoid permanently, like excessive sugar intake and wheat/grains, simply because they’re not good for our bodies in excess. Other things, I may add back in at a later date, like that gluten-free veggie pasta people keep telling me about. Time will tell.
But that’s not why I began writing this post. I wanted to share with you guys an odd thing I’ve begun noticing since I began sharing my ‘workouts’. I do something new, break some personal record, whatever, and I get excited and share it with people, but I’ve been downplaying it. Like this shit isn’t worth my excitement because someone else can do it better or faster. Whaaat?!
I’m nipping that in the bud, right now. Sure, people who have been physically active for a while can blow by me without getting winded. They may be able to do 100 push-ups, or 10, or even 1 proper push-up, and they’ve surpassed my level of physical fitness, but is that worth me not shouting my personal successes to the rooftops? Hell, no!
You know why? Because while yes, many people are more fit than I am, many of them aren’t putting effort into improving that fitness. But I am. I’m getting out there in the heat, I’m pushing myself to be better than I am. I’m trying every day to get just a little faster, a little farther, to make it to that next mailbox before I have to dial it back and catch my breath.
And why am I doing with a smile what I have labeled as ‘torture’ so many times in the past? What changed? My motivation. Or to quote a dear friend, my ‘Why’ has changed. I’m not pushing against being ‘unattractive’ (read: fat… which, oddly enough, is only synonymous with ‘unattractive’ in relation to myself!). I’m not pushing against anything. I’m allowing myself to be pulled. Pulled by joy. Pulled by excitement. By pride in my accomplishments. By feeling stronger. By feeling better than I will feel if I don’t do the thing.
So the question is… why would I try to tone down my excitement? Why would I downplay the things I accomplish that make me burst with pride, just because someone else, on their own very different path, with their own life lessons to learn, may not be as impressed with me as I am?
Yeah, I don’t know, either.
So, on that note…
I DID IT AGAIN! BUT BETTER!
If anyone was curious, I’m using the free version of the Endomondo app in the Google Play Store to track my activities. I don’t know if there is an iPhone version available or not.
I’m learning that it’s important to keep the fires of pride in your accomplishments stoked high, and downplaying them just because others may not call them ‘big’ or ‘important enough’ doesn’t do anything except keep you small. It saps your motivation and your drive, because the more you tell others it’s not that important, the more you begin to believe it yourself.
If it makes you excited, crow about it!